The Domestication of Sheila?

I GOT SACKED TODAY!
To all my friends, please consider this my official sugar-coated "press release." So I don't have to repeat this story to everyone over and over again. :)
Actually, I got sacked yesterday but I signed the papers today, so Dec. 23, 2005 is the official day. I wasn't really surprised at all, I sensed it coming my way months before the management (parang andami) talked to me. The company that I work for (I'm still here until Jan. 22, 2006) is having a bit(?) of a dry spell and so they had to cut down their people. I'm the only person left in the creative department, they retrenched me, go figure.
The thing that's bothering me is that after they informed me that they're letting me go, they offered me a job as a consultant. They're asking me to report on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays for 5 hours each day. Should I be thankful or should I be insulted? I'm not really sure how I should feel about it.
But I think I'm gonna accept their offer. I asked them for a little raise for my 'consultancy' fee and I hope they give it to me. The company really need to cut down expenses, cut down people to survive. I hope they do. I think a little 'raise' won't hurt them, after all, they don't have to pay me my whole salary monthly, they don't have to give me benefits and all. Not too bad a deal.
I don't have any problem talking about my retrenchment and writing about it, but when I read and signed my Notice of Termination, SHIT! reading the word TERMINATION hit me big time. I've never been terminated my whole life! But, really, I feel okay, as long as I don't read my notice. At least, I have my separation pay to look forward to. Sana lang ibigay.
I talked to my kids, I explained to them that we may need to cut down our konting luho because nanay doesn't have a job anymore, they felt sad for a moment, I thought it was because of the happy meals and kiddie meals that we had to cut down, I was wrong, my son worriedly asked me "Nanay, talaga wala ka na tilbaho? Paano na house natin? Sleep na ba kami sa kansada?" See, my son is quite mature for his age, he still can't write well but he understands. But you know how kids are, they don't take anything seriously for a long time, after a minute or so they realized that they will see me more often around the house, I could make them sandwiches for baon instead of buying them, I could pick them up from school every Tuesdays and Thursdays...silly kids. They're quick to cry, they're quick to laugh, they're quick to forgive, pure innocent souls.
Maybe God has a better plan for me or maybe this is his way of telling me to be a better mother to my kids and a better wife to my husband? I'm not a bad mother and I'm not a bad wife either but I haven't really been superb at it also. My husband smiled when I told him about my status in the office, I was sure he wanted to jump and scream, I'm sure he's celebrating, but he didn't show it. He just said "Good, I'll see more of you around the house." Maybe it's high time for me to be domesticated. Waaaahhh... parang farm animal.
I wonder how long will I be able to do it before I look for another day job? The last time I took the role of a full time housewife and mother, I went mad. Will I be better this time? Will I become the sixth "Desperate Housewives?" Maybe I should write Richard Quest and tell him about my "Quest?"
At the moment, I'm not at all worried because I have a tutoring job on weekends, thank God, I could even accommodate more tutoring jobs on weekdays since I'm free on Tuesdays and Thursdays. I may not be totally financially dependent on my husband, at least, not yet. If there's one thing I hate is asking for money. There's no better feeling than buying what you want using the money that you worked hard and sweated for. It's all about freedom, baby! Not being dependent on anyone, specially when it comes to money.

Living with the threat of a suddenly thrown rock

Voting comes at a high price in Iraq

By Anderson Cooper
CNN

BAGHDAD, Iraq (CNN) -- "Goddamned son of a bitch!" The soldier's shouting woke me up. I was riding in the back of a Humvee heading from Baquba to Baghdad when a rock nearly hit the gunner whose head was sticking out the roof. The rock was thrown by a kid, one of many rocks I saw being thrown.

I don't want to give the wrong impression, however. I saw dozens of kids smiling and waving at American soldiers, too. But sometimes, when the kids get in groups, they also throw rocks. There's not much you can do about it. You just have to keep driving.

In Baquba, a sandstorm almost blew us off the air this morning, but the weather broke just in time. It took us about five hours to get back to Baghdad. We'd hitched a ride on a Blackhawk to get to Baquba, but the storm grounded all the choppers. To get back, the military let us ride along on several different patrols.

The election was yesterday, but they are still counting ballots here. They will be for days. It's possible we won't know the results of the elections until sometime in January.

Watching people vote yesterday was very moving. It is one of those moments in my life I will always remember.

In the end it seems such a simple thing. People standing up, casting a vote, having a say. So simple, but here the price has been high.

Before I left Camp Warhorse today in Baquba, I once again stopped by what they call their "Wall of Heroes," pictures of the 29 members of the 3rd Brigade killed in Iraq.

They are all ages, all races, all Americans. Some smile in candid photos taken by their buddies. Some appear somber in formal portraits taken for ID's. All are silent. All are heroes.

I'm only admitting to one thing, I kiss Anderson only in magazines, I've done that a couple of times, no harm done. I say goodbye and goodnight to him regularly, it's no big deal. I've thought about kissing him on TV but it's too much. I can't possibly do that. What would my daughter think of me if she saw me doing that?

However, this morning while watching 360, I was, like, 2 feet away from the TV, Anderson was reporting and then he moved forward, towards the camera. Almost instantly, without batting an eyelash, I moved forward also as if I was about to kiss him! I didn't think, I just moved forward. I felt dizzy from restraining myself cause I really, really wanted to kiss him. Thank goodness, I didn't, I still had my sanity intact, after all.

Andy, we need to talk!

I feel so much better now that Anderson seems content to stay in Baquba, which is a rather safer place than Baghdad. Today is the general election day in Iraq. I hope he stays safe.

Don't forget to wear your bulletproof vest, Anderson!

'It's going to be a good day'

With optimism, Iraqis head to the polls

By Anderson Cooper

BAQUBA, Iraq (CNN) -- "It's going to be a good day."

That's what the gunner of the Humvee I rode in this morning said. She wasn't talking about this country's historic elections; it was more of a daily affirmation, the kind of thing I think she says every morning, but that doesn't matter.

I think it is going to be a good day. I'm in Baquba, a city that last year was a hotbed of the insurgency. Now, attacks in this province are down 30 percent to 40 percent.

Right now I'm in a polling station, and it's a couple of hours before people can vote. I'm sitting in a ceramic plated armored vest, and we are setting up for broadcast.

Polls will open halfway through 360, and if people are lined up, we should be able to see the first votes being cast in this city. That's the plan. Of course, in Iraq plans don't mean much.

Last January at this polling station, the election officials didn't show up for several hours, nor did the ballots. People here didn't actually get to vote until the afternoon. Even if people don't show this morning, it's going to be exciting.

I've been to a number of countries for historic elections: Cambodia after years of brutal rule and occupation, South Africa after apartheid. South Africa was extraordinary. The line I stood on in Soweto snaked for hours, people waiting patiently in the hot sun.

I was in Baghdad in January as well. There was such excitement, so much was unknown. Would insurgents attack polling sites? Would people come out? They did, and the insurgents didn't. The difference this time is that many Sunnis seem to have realized they made a mistake by not participating then, and they plan to cast votes now.

As the day progresses, we shall see.

Another Iraq Blog Soldiers say media miss Iraq story

'So much of what happens here never makes the nightly news.'

By Anderson Cooper
CNN

BAQUBA, Iraq (CNN) -- We're in Baquba today, about 35 miles north of Baghdad. We hitched a ride this morning on a Blackhawk helicopter after finishing the show, and spent much of the day on patrol with the U.S. military.

I'm usually not all that impressed by machines, but Blackhawks are amazing. The heavy rotors slice the air. The sound is at once crushing and comforting. You take off, fly low, at times skimming treetops.

It's been a long day, and will likely be a long night.

I just finished writing an account of the patrol that will be on our show in a couple of hours. It's now nearly 10 p.m. here, and I still have a couple other pieces to write. We go live at 6 a.m. Iraq time, which is 10 p.m. on the East Coast. So I'm not sure I will be able to sleep tonight.

I can't complain, however. The soldiers I spent the day with work around the clock seven days a week. They can't keep regular shifts because they don't want insurgents to be able to track their routines. (Cooper: 'I had my first gun pointed at me today')

The unit I spent the day with is one month shy of going home. The commander, Capt. Patrick Moffett, was very optimistic about progress in Iraq, and by some accounts Baquba is a real success story. Attacks have dropped 30-40 percent since last year, and the Iraqi police in the city actually are able to conduct some operations on their own.

I'm planning on going out on patrol with Iraqi forces tomorrow, which should be interesting. They don't have armored vehicles, so it's a bit dicey. But I think it's an important story. It's worth seeing them operate for myself.

I'm always incredibly impressed by the U.S. service members I meet here. They are not all as optimistic and supportive of the mission as the captain I spent time with today, but they are all dedicated to their units, devoted to their fellow troops. I think a lot of us in the states forget how difficult it is for the families of these soldiers and marines, airmen and sailors.

They are away for so long. Multiple tours in Iraq are not uncommon.

Every soldier I talked to today said the media hasn't done a good job of telling the full story from Iraq. It's a complaint I've heard before, and certainly understand. I do think television tends to focus on the bombs and the bullets, the most dramatic headlines. So much of what happens here never makes the nightly news.

When today's patrol ended, one of the soldiers said to me, "Sorry it wasn't more exciting for you." I told him I wasn't looking for excitement, and in fact, I was glad the day unfolded as it did.

It reminded me that life in Iraq is never what you expect it to be. The situation here is far more complex and the fight far more nuanced than it is often portrayed.

What the #%@!

Geez, Anderson, you don't have to tell the whole world! *blushing*

( I actually stole the idea from the kind folks at Anderson Daily, thanks for the photo, too!)

Another Shameless Anderblog

My chest is so tight today, I can barely breathe. I'm worried about the situation here in the office, some of us might be evicted again, our boat is sinking, must find me a life jacket!

Another thing that makes me worried since last week is that Anderson Cooper is in Baghdad! He's there for the Iraqi elections which makes Baghdad twice as dangerous.I hope he doesn't get hurt, and the whole CNN crew too.

And then I read this blog... (where's your bulletproof vest, anderson!) *faints*

Cooper: War is hell, opportunity

'I had my first gun pointed at me today'

By Anderson Cooper
CNN

BAGHDAD, Iraq -- We arrived in Baghdad this morning. Caught the first flight in from Amman, Jordan. It's a Royal Jordanian flight, but the crew is South African, because contractors are the only ones willing to take the risk.

At the airport, there are long lines of people waiting for visas. Reporters and Iraqis, former military guys now working for Halliburton, shaved heads, duffel bags, drawn by the lure of money. War is hell, but it's also an opportunity.

The first thing you do when you step out of the airport is slap on a bulletproof vest. The road from the airport used to be considered one of the most dangerous in the world, but not anymore. The United States has tightened its grip, increased patrols in surrounding neighborhoods. The Iraqi National Guard has posted checkpoints on all the road's on-ramps.

The Iraqi police and military are all over the streets. They've started to shut the place down in advance of the elections. I'm surprised how many troops and cops they have on the ground. I don't know how good any of them are, but what they may lack in quality, they seem to be making up for in numbers.

I had my first gun pointed at me today. We were in a car, waiting for an Iraqi patrol to pass by. The Iraqi police ride around in these tricked-out pickup trucks with 50-caliber guns mounted in the back. It reminds me of Somalia and the technicals.

Anyway, you've got to feel for the Iraqi cops. They have no armor on their vehicles, and they are all crowded into the pickup, one on top of the other, totally exposed. It's no wonder they are kind of tense.

This guy pointed his machine gun straight at my car. He was telling us to stay back. We waited until they were about 50 yards ahead before we started on our way. No reason to take any chances.

I went over to Yarmouk Hospital, a place I've visited every time I've come to Baghdad. The place was crawling with Iraqi security forces. There had been an attack earlier, and a half dozen or so Iraqi troops were injured.

They took over the emergency room, made sure the doctors gave them their undivided attention. We weren't there to videotape them, but they freaked when they saw the camera. After about 10 minutes of shouting, we were all great friends.

We interviewed a young doctor about what has and hasn't changed. It was interesting. He asked my producer, who speaks Arabic, to only speak to him in English. Turns out he didn't want the Iraqi police stationed at the hospital to hear what he had to say.

He doesn't trust the cops who are there to protect him. He worries some of them are connected to the insurgents, and he's afraid they might rat him out.

Welcome to Iraq. The cops dress like insurgents, and the insurgents dress like cops. Nothing is easy. Nothing is what it seems.

ANDERSON'S going to baghdad next week! Must go there!