In God’s Time

I think I might have to find me a new job!
My current office has become my comfort zone and I have become too comfortable for my own good! I’ve been planning to find a new company to work for since last year…but laziness got the better of me.
But is it really laziness? (I think I’ve fallen in love with my MAC G4, I can’t leave my Mac! feeling akin talaga?)

When I resigned from my previous employer…I wasn’t really looking for a new job, well, I was looking but not seriously, I mean, I was serious but…I can’t really explain… this job that I have now, it sort of like fell on my lap, I prayed for a new job (mahigit isang taon din yun ah) and God gave it to me, though not immediately, but still, He gave what I asked for.
Six years ago, I was a stay-at-home mom, I was eager to go back to work but I was also hesitant because I wasn’t sure if I were competent enough to be part of the work force again. I went crazy, the whole time I was at home, sure, I was playing mommy to my kids…I pretended to be sane whenever I was with them. Don’t get me wrong, I love my kids with all my heart and I really enjoy being with them but something inside of me was crying for help. I felt depressed. I was angry for no reason. I was always crying for no reason. I was silently screaming at the top of my lungs!
My husband couldn’t understand me. How could he? When I, myself, couldn’t understand me.
I became bestfriends with Oprah and Dr. Phil at the time, because of "Oprah" I had reasons to cry. Do you remember that time (around 1999) when Oprah was already really BIG in America and she said that she won’t be featuring celebrities on her shows because she didn’t really need the ratings anymore? Instead she’d be featuring themes that would promote self healing and forgiving people that hurt you and other stuff like that, well, that was the time when she became my bestfriend. I watched her show every 1 pm on weekdays, faithfully. True enough, I learned ways to deal with the anger and frustrations I had in me. But mostly, it was post-partum depression that I suffered, the frustrations and anger came in as a result of my depression. I still consider her my bestfriend, mind you.
Anyway…what I really want to say is that, I got a call one day from a friend of mine, she asked me if I wanted to work again, "Heck YES!" I said. That was it, I was working since then. It was what I needed, I needed to feel productive again, I wanted to help my husband financially. God helped me, He knows what I needed and He gave it to me exactly when I needed it.
So, now, I’m like, waiting for it to happen again, I’m still looking for a job, sure, but I guess I am waiting for God to make it happen. I know He will give me a new job, not just now…I know he will… someday. In His time, not mine.